I get asked this quite a lot form both men and women. There is definitely a bit of unrest with men when it comes to using sex toys in a relationship – you usually hear the ‘she doesn’t need them with me’ being thrown around and when you care for someone you don’t want them feeling anything but amazing. So my top tip when it comes to introducing toys to a relationship is to of course start with building them up and telling them how and what they do that drives you wild. Men are very visual beings so perhaps describe a scenario where you always both really enjoy it – then perhaps add in – ‘do you know what would be really great at that point’?? ‘a small vibrator on me whilst you concentrate on being inside me.’ Also most partners love to make the other happy – once they see how amazing an orgasm is from vibrations and how they feel like they are part of it there will be no looking back!
There are some other ways that may work when introducing them to your partner without them feeling excluded or made to feel inadequate:
I personally think that this is a great way to introduce toys into the bedroom. Buy them as presents – guys if your girl is shy start with something unintimidating and with a lower vibration like Selene or Rhea. Either way the idea of wanting to give extra pleasure to your partner can be a massive turn on. Rings are also a great way to start as well – they prolong an erection which will increase enjoyment for both of you.
Has a detachable bullet so makes it double the fun. Another good place to start is by using a toy that is designed more for massage.
Is far away from traditional shapes and we suggest you use it for massaging the body including sensitive areas to get the mood flowing.
Girls if you want to introduce vibrations into your bedroom but don’t want him to feel like he isn’t enough then set the scene – get the lingerie on, light the candles and perhaps start with the least phallic of our range like Eris. Suggest to him that you want to try it out with him and use it together – gently push him in the direction of him being in control of it.
Give him encouragement and direction and be sure to let him know how good it feels so his confidence grows.
A lot of the time I talk to people they are open with the idea of their partners masturbating but it isn’t something that they talk about or do together – this is a great way of introducing toys/vibrations to a couple – suggest to your partner that you would like to partake in some mutual masturbation – invite him to watch you use your new toy that you bought for the occasion (even better if you can both be involved in the shopping experience) – you may be surprised at how much he wants to be involved once things get moving. This can be a little daunting and something that may be best for a well established relationship where you feel totally at ease with one another – the addition of a glass of wine often helps inhibitions to melt away a little too.
Toys can be a great addition to the bedroom and can really enrich the experience for both parties. Try to remember to ensure your partner that it is not a short coming form them – it is just something extra that you can both enjoy – failing that, send them this article so they know that with us its always a pleasure.